Nobody's Home
by Adrian Jade
Summary: Her feelings she hides, her dreams she can't find. She's losing her mind, she's fallen behind. And she can't find her place, she's losing her faith. She's fallen from grace, she's all over the place.
1. Chapter 1

_Prologue:_

"_Hey there baby brother." I crept closer to my brother's crib. Wyatt looked up at me and smiled. I brought my hand down to caress his soft cheek. "No force field huh?" I got bold, I picked my brother up and cradled him in my arms. Wyatt cooed and part of me felt bad for hating this part of myself. I blamed my parents for abandoning me. For sending me away at such a young age._

"_Who are you and what are you doing with my son?" I could hear the frantic outrage in her voice. I looked up into a face that nearly mirrored my own. She seemed stunned to see a duplicate of herself in front of her._

_My father orbed in behind her. He gave me a fierce look. "You shouldn't be here." His voice was calm but also very scolding._

"_Why not? This is my home as much as it is anyone else's." I placed Wyatt back into his crib._

"_Leo ... who is this girl?" Tears pricked my eyes after being referred to as this girl. It wasn't her fault really. Her memories had been erased shortly after my birth. I was a stranger to her._

"_Piper, this is Nevaeh." Leo introduced me. "Our daughter." His words weren't as powerful as I expected them to be. I guess in my mind I always pictured fireworks and instant recognition._

"_Leo ... I don't understand." She was as confused as I was._

"_Let me handle this one Father." The way I said the word made it sound like a curse. "As you know Leo has been watching over you and your sisters your whole lives. Well one night about sixteen years ago Leo's resolve crumbled and you two slept together. I was conceived and you gave birth to me. Shortly after my birth Grams and Leo decided that it was too dangerous for everyone involved and I was sent to live at Magic School. Your memory was erased and that is why you have no recollection of me." I gave my father a forced smile. "Did I miss anything?"_

"_Nev that is enough." Leo's tone was gentle yet firm._

"_How is this possible?" My mother looked faint. I guided her over to a nearby chair. I moved a few inches away to give her some space. Part of me still wasn't sure if I wanted to let her get to know me. I still felt so alone and abandoned. I was cast aside by the people who were supposed to love me the most. "Uncle Leo" as I had been raised to call him tried his best to explain to me why I needed to be kept away but it didn't make sense to me at all. Maybe I didn't want it to make sense. Maybe I wanted to remain mad in order to keep them at arms length._

_She looked at me with conflicted honey colored eyes. "I can't do this right now." She shook her head sadly._

_It felt as if a dagger had been plunged into my heart. I orbed out without saying another word. So much for my home coming._


	2. Chapter 2

It had been two years since I had last had any contact with my biological family. Well except for Wyatt that is. My baby brother I always made a point in seeing. It wasn't his fault that he had been kept and I hadn't. Neither of us had asked to be born so I could hardly blame him. But sometimes I did feel incredibly envious of him. Why was he allowed to be raised by MY family? But I always push those feeling aside. I will not hate my little brother.

They have tried to find me but I have become very good at covering my tracks. I have studied both sides of the magical world. I know every clocking spell there is out there. There is no way anyone could find me unless I wanted to be found, or at least that is what I thought.

I happened to be asleep that particular morning that my mother and aunts first found me. I had been at that particular apartment about three months. I should have known better. I normally never stay in one place that long. I enjoyed the nomadic life too much to ever be tied down.

"See I told you it would work." I could hear one of them say. I shot out of bed, a knife instantly in my hand. One could never be too careful.

"What are you doing here?" My tone unpleasant, hostel almost.

"We've been looking for you for a long time Nev." Paige appointed herself to be the one to talk to me.

"That is because I didn't want to be found. I don't know how you managed to find me but forget this location. Forget me."

"Whether you like it or not you are a member of this family." My mother chose to speak. How many times I had longed to hear something like that as a child. But here and now the words seemed empty.

I looked at all of them and let out a chuckle. "I have no family. I have no allegiances. I am a lone wolf and would like to remain that way."

"Nev, I know what you are feeling." Paige was trying to use some sort of psycho babble on me. But I knew she had no idea what I felt.

Phoebe on the other hand knew exactly what I was feeling. She gave me a painful look before she turned around and slapped my mother in the face. "How dare you let them abandon me!" She yelled.

"Nev, I was just a child myself and I had my memories erased. If there was any way I could have kept you I would have. But I had choice over the matter than you did. We were both the innocent victims."

"Leave me alone!" I roared before orbing out.

--

"_Maybe giving her a charge will calm her down." Leo suggested to one of fellow elders. "Maybe if she has someone to care for it will help her deal with all the hurt and anger she keeps locked inside."_

"_Yes but how do we keep her in one place long enough?"_

"_I have an idea. I don't want to have to resort to this but it needs to be done."_

--

I was at my happy place. I had traveled all over the world and seen every sight there was to see but this spot still remained my favorite. There was something about the rolling green hills of Ireland that seemed to comfort me. Looking out onto the vast green nothingness allowed me to clear my head. It allowed me to think about things rationally. I was so lost in my own little world that I did not hear the noise behind me.

My once peaceful bliss was disturbed by a devastating pain in my right shoulder. I yelped as I pulled a dark lighter's arrow out of my own flesh. I was disoriented already. Colors became jumbled, my mind became incredibly slow. I could feel myself sinking. Sinking into blackness. The last thing I remember seeing before I lost consciousness was my father standing over me with a dark lighter's crossbow.

--

I awoke sometime later. My mind was still sluggish. I tried to speak but everything seemed hazy to me. But I wasn't in any pain, my eyes drooped between being half open and half closed. I wanted to go back to sleep but I would not let myself.

"You have been drugged Nev." My father ran a cool cloth across my forehead. "I was the only way to keep you from running away. You need to face your responsibilities. You are part Whitelighter and it is about time you had your own charge."

"You shot me." Was the only coherent thing I could think to say.

"I didn't want to you have to believe me on that. But you also have to admit that it was the only way I could have gotten even this much time to speak to you."

"Why are you doing this to me Leo? Why couldn't you just let me die or strip my powers as a child and give me to a normal family? Why didn't you want me?" I cried. In my drugged up state it was the only thing I could do. This was the only way I could get answers.

"Nev ..." He started then sighed. "I always wanted you. I was selfish and wanted to keep you but at that time it wasn't safe for you or for us. If anyone had ever found out then they would have killed you. I'd rather have you hate me your whole life then to know that you were dead. That is part of being a good parent. You are angry right now but if you give it some time and allow yourself to see through the pain you will see that what me and your great-grandmother did was out of love. Grams loved you too. It hurt her to give you up. She was a wreck for weeks after that but we both knew that it was for the best and that you were safer where you were."

"All I ever wanted was to have a family that loved me." I said before it all went dark again. That really was all I had ever really wanted. Every birthday and Christmas that is all I ever wished for, I wanted a family.


	3. Chapter 3

My earliest memories in life were from Magic School. I remember all the kids talking to each other, showing off their powers. I never showed off mine though. "Uncle Leo" had taught me from a very young age that it was very dangerous to let people know that I was part whitelighter. I would always ask him why I was never allowed to orb or heal. He would always pat me on the head and tell me that my powers were too special and if people knew about them they would try to take them away from me. Later on in life I found out about the no whitelighter/charge romance rule and the real reason Leo never wanted me to reveal my whitelighter half was to keep me alive.

In a way I can understand why he did this, if it were my child I probably would have done the same thing. What I never understood was why after Leo and my mom married hadn't they come and gotten me. Things might have been so much different if they had.

"Nevaeh, are you listening to me?" Leo asked annoyed. His hands were on his hips as he looked at me. He was explaining to me the whole whitelighter process worked.

"Uh huh." I replied to him even though I was not listening at all to what he was saying. To tell you the truth I really did not care at all about what he was saying. Why should I care? Being part whitelighter had caused me nothing but misery my whole life. Now the higher ups had decided that I had to do their bidding. Yeah that ain't happening.

"Then what was the last thing I said?" Leo asked. If he thought he was going to slip me up he had another thing coming.

"Having a charge is a huge honor and it is my job to protect them with my life yadda yadda some other crap." Leo rolled his eyes. I could tell I was getting on his nerves. Well the feeling was mutual. I crossed my arms. "What's the matter Leo? Regretting having me?"

"Nevaeh." He sighed. "I have never regretted having you. Maybe the timing yes but never you."

"Why should I ever bother with this shit? I owe the elders nothing. I spent half my life hiding in plain sight from them and now I am supposed to spend the rest of my life being their lackey."

Leo began rubbing his temples. Part of me felt bad for giving him such a hard time. He really was trying after all but the little girl who wanted a father was long gone. When I looked at the man before me all I could feel was bitterness from being abandoned. What had I done wrong? Why wasn't I good enough to be kept by my parents the way my younger brother were?

"Must you always be such a hardheaded brat?" He bit out finally loosing his patience. In a strange way I had more respect for this Leo than the calm one.

"You created me." I shot back. He wasn't going to forget that fact any time soon. Not that he could even if he wanted to.

"Let's just get back to the lesson please. Maybe when you have a more rational head we can talk about the past."

"Don't see that ever happening." I slid down in my chair a little bit. I thought I might have saw a small smile grace Leo's lips. But it was gone so fast I could not be sure. All I really could be sure of was like it or not I had to do what these people told me to do. I had no choice in the matter and it sucked big time.


End file.
